Yeah so...

I was never really good at hiding my emotions. Especially if you are face to face with me. So I am sitting at work. Clearly looking sad, my co worker comes over to me and of course she notices. She asked me if I wanted something from a restaurant she was going to get dinner from later. She then says to me "You look sad muffin" (we call each other cute lil' names like that). Then I reply "Yeah just a little." So she lets me know if I want to talk I can come to her desk. She walks away and I immediately start tearing up. I don't even know where it came from. I ducked down at my desk a little, thank god for the cubicle having high walls. I wiped my eyes very carefully trying no to mess up my eye makeup. I just took a look at myself in the mirror and thought why am I like this. I so fragile it feels like everything around me is slowly falling apart. I need to be the one to put things together. I do need to take up more of my time and not allow myself to dwell and think about the problems that haunt me. I am going to the store tomorrow and I am finally buying myself a digital camera. I've always loved photography but I never took action. I have all the resources around me to do so. I need to actually do things for myself and that I have been putting off forever. I just need to get lost in myself for awhile and kinda shut out the outside world. Well not completely shut myself out, but I need to focus on me.
I need some me time.